Author Topic: Problems and progress with reluctant and difficult partners.  (Read 30563 times)

JOhnGw

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Re: Problems and progress with reluctant and difficult partners.
« Reply #30 on: August 11, 2015, 07:02:43 PM »
Quote from: Duane
What is it about spas?

The bubbles!!!
Spa rule 3 - No farting unless the bubbles are switched on.
JOhn

Do not do unto others as you would that they should do unto you. Their tastes may not be the same.
George Bernard Shaw, Maxims for Revolutionaries

jbeegoode

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Re: Problems and progress with reluctant and difficult partners.
« Reply #31 on: August 11, 2015, 07:36:16 PM »
Quote from: Mrs. Nuduke
"No, I wouldn't make you wear trunks if we had our own jacuzzi or swimspa.  In fact I might not even wear swimwear myself - it seems silly, you wouldn't wear one in the bath, would you?"

Wow, John!  That IS fantastic progress!!!

Have fun, naked!
Larry (tanman in Texas)

I go out and buy one right now, if I was in your shoes, Nuduke.

There IS something about a spa. When I had mine in my twenties and thirties, literally hundreds of people went through it naked as the years passed, especially after a few drinks, particularly after the bars closed.
Jbee
Barefoot all over, all over.

eyesup

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Re: Problems and progress with reluctant and difficult partners.
« Reply #32 on: August 11, 2015, 09:57:10 PM »
Quote from: John
Er..is that tautology?

From the meaning of the words, yes. Although it wasn't intended that way. It is from a movie, the one Larry noted, and is from a scene that has always made me laugh. It’s a great little scene most people aren’t even aware of. It is packed with a whole lot of American and Indian history in just a few lines.

Chief Dan George has just gone through the whole litany of tribulations of the American Indian Tribes. They had to deal with the American government's breaking of treaties and the destruction of their culture and life because of the arrival of the Europeans. After being told to ‘endeavor to persevere’, the leaders of the Five Nations meet, talk and think about what they were told. After concluding that they had thought long enough, they decide the most appropriate response was to, “Declare War on the Union”.

All this smack in the middle of the backdrop of the end of the Civil War. It's a little, short history lesson that 'Josey Wales' is learning 1st hand.

Duane

eyesup

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Re: Problems and progress with reluctant and difficult partners.
« Reply #33 on: August 11, 2015, 10:36:12 PM »
Quote from: Jbee
Wasn't there a movie about her? Wasn't Diana Ross "Lady sings the Blues" about a Billie Holiday character? What's so unusual? SHe be blues, original soul, emotion expressed in a vocalist's song.

If you've read or know anything about her childhood, her ability as a blues singer is not surprising.

Yeah, that’s the movie about her, but I’m not sure Diana Ross was the best choice. Sarah Vaughn or Carmen McRae come to mind as better choices. But they didn’t ask me when making the movie.

Duane

nuduke

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Re: Problems and progress with reluctant and difficult partners.
« Reply #34 on: August 11, 2015, 11:22:26 PM »
I've posted this duplicate here as this is a better place for it - I just posted it in the thread "A Trip to Menorca"
Quote from: Nuduke
I just re-read Duane & jbee's recollections of June 30th of meeting Mrs N last year and noted that they both have positive recollections of her.  I just felt motivated to add that she is indeed a most personable, liberal minded, intelligent person
Quote from: eyesup
I found her to be a lively and engaging personality during the time we spent
Quote from: jbee
She was a lively and open wonderful soul with us, who confided to me that you were the less liberal/experimental of the two.
Good assessments both!  And I make these points to counterweight all the stuff I've talked about relating to her dislike of naturism and issues with me being nude and with herself disliking to be nude and her general dislike of naturism in others.  My moaning and complaining reports of our ongoing debate around my naturism must make her seem like a right miserable old harridan!  Nothing could be further from the truth. 

Just setting the record a bit straighter for next time I report some adverse spousal progress!

John (loving husband) :)

John

JOhnGw

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Re: Problems and progress with reluctant and difficult partners.
« Reply #35 on: August 12, 2015, 07:57:20 AM »
I strongly suspect that if you weren't a kind and loving husband there would have been not problems - you would have done whatever you wanted regardless of whether it made her miserable or not.
JOhn

Do not do unto others as you would that they should do unto you. Their tastes may not be the same.
George Bernard Shaw, Maxims for Revolutionaries

nuduke

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Re: Problems and progress with reluctant and difficult partners.
« Reply #36 on: August 12, 2015, 10:08:39 PM »
I strongly suspect that if you weren't a kind and loving husband there would have been not problems - you would have done whatever you wanted regardless of whether it made her miserable or not.

Very perceptive, JOhn.  This is really the heart of the issue - I'm too damn nice!  If I wasn't concerned about her feelings so much I'd have said "like it or lump it"!  She may well have lumped it! :)  But life's not like that is it?  Naturism is but one thing amongst many vying for priority!

John

jbeegoode

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Re: Problems and progress with reluctant and difficult partners.
« Reply #37 on: August 13, 2015, 07:54:08 PM »
My attitude is not always as accommodating. I see a need for boundaries and place for my individual self as well as the partnership. DF has driven this home to me. If I told her that she was making me miserable by doing something that had little of my interest, she would remind me that I am making myself miserable and that is not ultimately her responsibility. I add that she doesn't like to see my discomfort, but realizes that it is not her responsibility, but my stuff.

There are many places to stand on this long continuum and like anyone else, I move around on it. It feels good to give away some of this individuality at times. It is as being of service, when it is in a broader context. It is ones choice.

A relationship is about the shared activities and these often blossom into more. Heh, hee, I repeat, Buy a jet spa as an investment with incredible returns. ;D ;) You are obviously a romantic and she has lost the game already.
Jbee
Barefoot all over, all over.

nuduke

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Re: Problems and progress with reluctant and difficult partners.
« Reply #38 on: August 14, 2015, 11:29:00 PM »
Quote
You are obviously a romantic and she has lost the game already.
Nice thought!

John

JOhnGw

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Re: Problems and progress with reluctant and difficult partners.
« Reply #39 on: August 25, 2015, 10:22:33 PM »
While M is definitely not a reluctant or difficult partner, being a keen holiday and swim naturist we have had a significant milestone this evening.
She remarked "It's good to see you relaxed enjoying the air naked," which is something that has never happened so positively before.
JOhn

Do not do unto others as you would that they should do unto you. Their tastes may not be the same.
George Bernard Shaw, Maxims for Revolutionaries

nuduke

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Re: Problems and progress with reluctant and difficult partners.
« Reply #40 on: August 27, 2015, 11:13:14 PM »
That's really nice to hear, JOhn
John

HairlessNude

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Re: Problems and progress with reluctant and difficult partners.
« Reply #41 on: August 28, 2015, 03:25:55 PM »
My wife was more than reluctant at the beginning.

I had been getting more & more interested in social nudity. Without telling her what I was doing, I booked us on a nude cruise. Holy cow, was she upset with me about that. She said that she wasn't going. I told her fine, but I was going to go either by myself or I'd find someone else to go with me. She didn't like that idea one bit.

I suggested that we go to a clothing optional resort to try getting used to being naked in front of other people. It took a little coaxing, but she agreed to go.

The first time that we went to a clothing optional resort. We arrived & I disrobed to go check in. she remained fully clothed & I didn't pressure her to get naked. The place was kind of run down & we only stayed about 15-20 minutes.

A few weeks later, we went to a different resort that was much nicer. We pulled into the parking lot & got out of the car. I started undressing & looked over at her. To my surprise, she was undressing as fast as I was! She was still self conscious, but we actually had a good time. We met a lot of very friendly people that really helped he to become more comfortable. At the end of the day, when we started to head for home sshe said that she had a good time & would like to go back again! We didn't make it back there that summer, but have been back a few times since then.

We did end up going on the nude cruise & had a fantastic time! As a matter of fact, we had such a good time that we booked the Big Nude Cruise for the following year before we even got off the ship from the first cruise.

She is still reluctant about being nude at home if she thinks there's any chance someone else will see her, but she has sure come a long way. She no longer has any hesitation about getting naked if she feels like it's totally acceptable for the situation.   ;D :D :D

nuduke

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Re: Problems and progress with reluctant and difficult partners.
« Reply #42 on: August 29, 2015, 12:23:33 AM »
How interesting, HN, that your wife came toward naturism with so little coaxing. There must have always been something there on the back burner, inhibited, that made her join in so readily.  Lucky chap!  How long ago was the event at the nicer CO resort and the nude cruise?

John


HairlessNude

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Re: Problems and progress with reluctant and difficult partners.
« Reply #43 on: August 31, 2015, 03:03:33 PM »
We're still fairly new to the "social nude" scene. The nicer C/O resort event was just last summer & the nude cruise was February of this year. I sure wish that we had discovered how enjoyable social nudity is years ago!

jbeegoode

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Re: Problems and progress with reluctant and difficult partners.
« Reply #44 on: September 29, 2015, 03:41:06 AM »
Nothing unusual with DF, but my neighbor told us last night at the henge, "Oh you guys would be so proud of us." They have been spending their time nude at home, and skinnydipping in the back yard. Her new boyfriend interjected, "Yea, we've become in home nudist."
He then looked around. The acoustics there are so, that everything said is transferred across and everywhere else...oops.
Jbee
Barefoot all over, all over.