The Secret Naturist Handbook

[jbeegoode]

I always note shelter from the sun...just in case.

My roaming is seldom without backup clothing. If I took this risk, these might be wise notes.

Having to MacGyver my way out of a jam hasn't happened. I note water, and alternate routes. Maybe a rock to pound stakes, or rocks to anchor a tent, alternative fire wood and pit, do it yourself bridges, might be as creative, I have needed to be.

A lone naked guy surviving in the woods is always intriguing...Naked and Afraid.
Jbee

[nuduke]

Here in south east Scotland,

That's forensically interesting, Jbee!  My understanding is that the SNH was written by Lookee.  I always thought he was in the USA somewhere.  Was (is) he a Scot, do you think?
John

[jbeegoode]

Yup, He's a Scot.
Jbee

[jbeegoode]

Weather Forecast; From The Secret Naturist Handbook

The planning of any secret naturist outing would not be complete without knowing what the weather forecast for the coming day will be. The weather forecast is not only essential for safety reasons such as for avoiding thunderstorms, but can also help you decide where to go in the first place.

The best place to find an up-to-date weather forecast is on the Internet and there are plenty of sites offering free and accurate weather forecasts for most areas of the globe. While it can be fun and satisfying to be able to predict the weather yourself, it's usually best to leave it up to the experts. However, do apply your own knowledge of a given area as most forecasts are general and will not take into account local micro-climates and weather patterns.

You need to actually study a weather forecast to get the best out of it. There is no point just looking and thinking it's going to be sunny or it's going to rain. What you should do, is look at each element of information on offer, i.e. temperature, cloud cover, wind speed and direction, rain or snow and so on and then ask yourself how this affects what you are planning to do.

For example, should rain be forecast with strong winds, you might be better off looking for a sheltered woodland location where an umbrella would keep you dry, rather than an exposed moorland location where the rain would be horizontal and your umbrella would be useless. Another example would be looking at what the maximum temperature will be and then heading out at the warmest time of day, usually in early to mid-afternoon when the sun has had the maximum amount of time to warm the earth. This can be most useful during the colder months when nudity is severely restricted.

It's also important to realise that the weather forecast is not 100% guaranteed correct, it is a forecast after all and a best estimate at what the weather will be. It could be wrong and local topography can make a huge difference to the actual weather. You only need to recall that temperature varies with height and can drop 1 degree C. for every 100 - 200m of ascent to realise that it might be warmer at the coast than up in the hills. I can vouch for this during the winter months when it can be 5 or more degrees C. warmer at the coast than at home.

[jbeegoode]

Yup.
Micro-climates are particular here where I live. With mountains a mile and more higher than valleys, it varies considerably. This is especially important in these wide open spaces.

The extreme heat and sun, is a death factor here. All of the seasonal flows of water are life and death issues.

Discomfort is not what I care to achieve when out wandering naked. I'm a fair weather nude hiker.
Jbee

[jbeegoode]

We have finished the section called "Planning." There is this short section called "Reports" with one report of taking the garbage out, then we move on sometime after Christmas.

Wheeling the Wheelie: From The Secret Naturist Handbook

My normal daily routine is to rise at 6.00am, have a shower, shave and complete the other usual early morning activities. I would usually spend this time naked, only dressing just before 7.15am for the drive to work across the city. Friday is different here in Edinburgh, this is the day we all put out our wheelie bins - that's rubbish bins to those not in the know. This morning I was determined to achieve something I had not yet managed to complete - put the wheelie bin out while naked.

This might not seem much of a challenge but I live in a housing estate near the capital and there is usually someone about at this time. I did not have to wheel the bin far, no more than 20m but it would be along the drive which is noisy and while 15m of the route is reasonably secluded, the last 5m is out into the street.

I started by switching off the sensor controlled floodlights along the drive - I had installed a switch indoors for just this purpose - then unlocked the door, using the sound created by flushing the toilet to mask the clunk of the five levers thumping home. It was important not to make too much noise as my wife was asleep in the bedroom. Mind you, she was actually on holiday today and was unlikely to rise for anything less than an explosion.

I then stepped outside into the small vestibule and glanced along the drive. Nothing was stirring and I couldn't hear any footsteps on the footpath across the road. This footpath runs through some bushes which provide some cover but with autumn now here the leaves are rapidly falling and in a few short weeks there will be no cover from that direction.

With the coast clear, I walked along the drive and carefully unlatched the gate leading into the garden. Pulling the wheelie bin across the gravel made a hell of a noise, not something I would normally bother about. But normally I'm fully clothed and these things are much more noticeable when naked.

I then pulled the bin onto the slab path, out through the gate and onto the drive. I was now exposed to the street although windowless house walls to both left and right provided cover from the sides. I thought it might be a good idea to push the wheelie bin rather than pull as this would provide some degree of cover to the front. The clack-clack of the wheels as they crossed the mono-block bricks was most disconcerting. I couldn't hear anything else and would not even hear a car approaching, let alone anyone on foot!

I soon reached the key part of the route, the end of the house. Venturing beyond this point took me out into the open and I would be visible to anyone in an arc of about 240 degrees. I paused for a few moments and then decided just to go for it, to act as if I was not doing anything unusual. I trundled down the drive and stopped the wheelie at the kerb. After a casual glance around, I sauntered back along the drive into the house. After latching the gate, I slipped back inside. A job well done!
Although this secret naturist adventure was short, it was very sweet. I'm always amazed how thrilling and enjoyable such a seemingly mundane activity as putting out the wheelie bin can be, if you do it naked. What a strange life we secret naturists lead!

[jbeegoode]

Two or three decades ago, I used to wheel the garbage out at my parents house while taking care of it while they were six months up at the summer house.

It was a quite neighborhood. Foothills/bajada thick Sonoran Desert vegetation, but because of a hill and a gully, it was quite an open clear view. The drive was I suppose a strait 220 feet downhill. with tall oleanders on one side.

I could use the size of the bin to cover me from the waist down, walking behind it, as I pushed. I would listen intently.

My concern was neighbors spotting me. Police wouldn't be by unless called.

I remember it being a rush, a physical excitement. The first time, I thought I was going to pass out as the blood was rushing and I was dizzy. After a while, cars might happen by, but I kept my cool hidden behind the bin. I'd have to force myself to not hurry back up the hill and once I did, I enjoyed the air, the night and the exhilaration of the liberation.

DF has two community recycling bins at her place, that have to be taken to the street bi-weekly.

The police will be seen once in a while cruising down the street there. There is quite a bit of foot traffic. I see someone else most times that I take the trash out, or drive down the street. There is a huge dumpster by the street and under a light and a pair of doors down that we take the small bags of garbage to.

We made the brave walk nude once several years ago. It is too risky to take the chance. It is a pain to have to dress to take it out. Usually, I just wrap a kilt, a couple of times underwear were used. When I know that the coast is clear, I remove the hassle of the garments and enjoy the night air on the way back.
Jbee

[Greenbare Woods]

We have a large bin that stays out at the road.  We take trash bags from the kitchen to the bin.  I often take the trash bags out to the road naked.  Sometimes I'm seen by passing traffic. I've been doing it naked for years.  It really doesn't matter if I'm seen while putting trash out naked.   

[jbeegoode]

We all deserve the comfortable situation that you are in, which is less legal interference with our bodies. The more relaxed and rural atmosphere is such a wonderful tempered vibe. I suspect that most people are live and let live attitudes, whether rural or urban/suburban. In town, most often, you don't really know your neighbors, and don't care what they do, if there is peace and the property values stay good.

I'm two blocks from a major police station, now.

I take my trash and recycling out the door to my SUV in the garage. Climb in and drive five miles to DF's house to dump it, when I visit there. I do it naked if I don't have a stop on the way. We compost organic materials kobashi method for the garden. We eat little packaged food. I was paying $8 to take out a small kitchen container of trash and was able to get off of the system, which was two huge wasteful bins on Wednesdays, only.
Jbee

[jbeegoode]

We begin the next section of the Secret Naturist Handbook, "Safety."

Dealing with Livestock:

Farmland, used for crop growing or livestock, forms large parts of the British countryside and the secret naturist who ventures into the countryside will be hard pressed to avoid such areas. Arable farms do not present much of a problem to the secret naturist other than detours to avoid damaging crops but farmland used for the rearing of livestock can present difficulties.

All domestic animals should be treated with respect and the best plan is to avoid that as much as possible. At best they can be unpredictable, at worst they might charge you. Horses, donkeys, sheep and cattle should all be left alone. If you find a field of livestock blocking your route, go the long way round if possible. If you have to cross the field keep to the perimeter fence, at least you can escape over it should you get into trouble.

Cattle and Bulls

If in a field containing cattle, look carefully for a bull which may be hidden in the herd or lying down. If there is a bull avoid crossing and seek an alternative route. Again, if you have to cross, keep close to the fence and be ready to bug out. If unsure which one is the bull, its the one without an udder! Always keep the bull in sight and never turn your back on it. If you must pass by a herd of cattle do so slowly and quietly and if cattle approach you, they will do so out of curiosity. Do Not Run - they may give chase and accidents may happen.

If you have inadvertently crossed a field containing a bull, back away slowly and seek an alternative route. Should a bull come towards you, look for a safe haven, escape route or high ground. Running away is unlikely to help as a bull can easily outrun a human. If the bull charges and no safe haven is available, use something to distract the bull, an item of clothing or rucksack. Throw this away from you and remain still, it should be distracted by the thrown object. Best of luck!

A useful tip to ascertain if cattle are present - look for cowpats! A simple and obvious thing to do, I know, but people's powers of observation are severely lacking these days. Most people only find them after they have stepped on one!

Horses.

Treat horses as you would cattle. Avoid any sudden noise or movement which may spook them. Horses are nervous, skittish animals and although they are unlikely to attack, they can inflict serious injury if they kick you. Generally, avoid if possible.

Sheep.

Generally, sheep will run away but ewes with lambs can become aggressive and will butt you if you approach their lambs to closely. Keep out of their way. Rams, the big ones with even bigger horns, should be avoided at all times. Although they are generally placid, they will not hesitate to charge if they think you are a threat and can be unpredictable.

One general rule with dealing with livestock, that is to avoid them whenever possible. If you disturb them, someone might notice and come to investigate.

[jbeegoode]

The bulls around here (the southwest) have been castrated, which takes the muster out of them. They are seen in the boondocks, on public lands roaming open range and not having much contact with people. They tend to bolt like wild animals in fear. Some seem to be attracted to moving vehicles, expecting a handout or water, as taught by the ranchers.

Cow paddies are a message that the nature in the area has been messed up.

I don't tempt them, anyway.

Sheep and horses are unusual. A couple of times the horses were wild, or escaped and lost away from their owners.

[jbeegoode]

By the way, here's the "Overview" of this "Safety" section:

The world is full of surprises and the secret naturist, who tends to explore countryside and other areas not usually explored by "normal" people and who also present an attractive target by being naked, tend to attract all manner of interesting creatures, many of which are intent on biting, stinging, eating and generally making life a misery for any unfortunate secret naturist who passes by.

This section looks at a number of the most common natural problems faced by secret naturists as well as other safety topics. Chances are you will never have to face any of them, but you never can tell when such an occasion could occur and a little knowledge goes along way. The advice in the pages of this section will help you avoid natural hazards in the first place, and also deal with those that cannot be avoided. Not all pages will be relevant in all parts of the world but with cheap air travel, the world is a far smaller place than it was only a few tens of years ago. What was exotic then is common-place now.

[jbeegoode]

Finding Shelter: From "The Secret Naturist Handbook"

Just suppose you have embarked on an extended secret naturist adventure and have hidden your clothing to be collected later. As you walk your confidence grows and you are soon further from your OP than ever before. Then, let us suppose the weather turns for the worst and it gets dark. You have a problem, your clothing is miles away and you need shelter fast. This page looks at solving this problem.

Natural Shelters

There are a whole host of natural shelters in the countryside just waiting to be found, you just have to look for them. The most obvious is woodland, with dense conifer plantations providing the best cover from the elements. In mixed woodland, look out for fallen trees that have rotten and hollow cores. Mature standing trees may also be hollow inside. Fill the inside with leaf litter, crawl inside and you have an instant sleeping bag. Where ever you find cliffs and rock outcrops, look for overhangs and caves that will provide shelter from the weather. Some caves can be bone dry, even in the wettest of conditions. However, do exercise caution in these locations.

Man-made Shelters

Not to be overlooked when you are naked and in need of some shelter, man-made structures can be found everywhere and anywhere and it can be surprising just how many sheds, barns, garages and the like can be found that are easily accessible. In farmland, barns and storage sheds are your best bet and many are often unlocked and easy to access. You may have to overcome your fear at approaching such a structure, especially if it is close to the farm house but just treat it as another challenge. Where a road crosses a stream or river, shelter can be found under bridges or inside culverts. You may get wet feet but the rest of you will stay dry and warm.

Leaf Shelter

When ready-made shelter is unavailable, you need to make you own and a simple leaf shelter is easy to make and will provide protection from the worst of the weather. First you need to construct a support framework just large enough to allow you to get inside. This can be done by using branches, sticks and twigs to provide a base to support the insulating layer. Next gather your insulation. This can be dry grasses, leaf litter or other substance, so long as it is reasonably dry. Pack your insulation all over your framework to a depth of at least 300mm or more. The thicker the insulation the warmer you will be when inside. You will also need to separate yourself from the ground. Construct a deep layer of fine branches and use as much insulation as you can to make the floor. When complete, get inside and pull in more insulation to plug the door. When building a leaf shelter, you can also make use of whatever other materials you find to hand. For example, polythene, bracken, wood, sheet metals and so on.

[jbeegoode]

unless I'm backpacking, I don't carry shelter. A summer monsoon thunder storm can sneak up pretty quickly. There isn't much to do, if it does, except be prepared. I just try to be prepared. I might have some coverings in a backpack, but generally, I'm jus naked and walking fast.
Jbee

[Greenbare Woods]

When I lived in New Mexico, USA, we often got serious afternoon thunder, lightning, and rain storms.  Being naked in the storm is a lot better than being clothed.  The rain soon ends and your skin drys off quickly.  Clothes stay wet and cold for hours. 

I also enjoyed visiting Spence Hot Spring while it was snowing.